Relaxed?

Old City Of Jerusalem, June, 1984

Save in Jerusalem with his remnants
I never once saw my father relaxed
and even then his face wore sweet wry smile
as if he knew that he indulged himself

he said he was going for groceries
to leave his wife free to study Torah
a stealthy stab deep into his own heart
by commentator of the loss of faith

thinner than he was before when he ate,
remembering famine, as if there were
no tomorrow, because there was then none,
he could have been an aged Scots bandit

he was free and lost at terrible cost,
so many others in the one he was