Lost Mind

When I found my mind
I found that I had lost it
Left it far behind

In my beginning
Her full lack of attention
Was focused on me

Tension in her touch
Told she couldn’t trust herself
Found me passing strange

With the pick of words
I excavate bleak treasure
I knew not knowing

My mother’s shadow
Dark, not even smooth, raised me
As much as she did

I filled emptiness 
With pretend, invented her
Whom I didn’t have

Beginner's poems
infiltrated blank of me,
unwilled company 

I’ve never trusted
The flickering images
That put me to sleep

In winter sunlight
Then and now dance together,
Dark arms entangled

When moon winks at me
I wonder if it always knew
As it waxed and waned?